Scottish Health Action on Alcohol Problems (SHAAP) published the blog below
See The Individual & Give More Acceptance
STIGMA… sadly is still experienced by some patients accessing health services. Throughout the years of supporting my son Graeme, we witnessed on many occasions the way that he was sometimes treated, or spoken to, in a more derogatory manner, due to his alcohol addiction.
My son first went to his GP for help in August 2015 and over the following 5 years it was a bit of a lottery as to how he might be listened to, spoken to, or treated. Sadly, it all depended on which doctor / health practitioner saw him that day. There were times when he just gave up and fell into a decline again because he said there was no point in going to see them.
One time when I was away from home, my sister had to call an ambulance for Graeme as he was so unwell. They went to A& E around 6pm. The doctor there eventually wanted to send him back home late at night, and to an empty house. My sister told me that it was plain to see that they were judging him purely on being an alcoholic. Thankfully my sister was there, fought his corner and argued against this. Eventually they relented and he ended up in a ward for 2 weeks!
Another time in A&E, he had been admitted as an emergency with a perforated ulcer. He was in so much pain. However, the A&E doctor started commenting about having seen him before and telling him in an abrasive manner that he had “a hole in his stomach and that’s because of the alcohol!” It was clearly not the time or place for these judgmental comments. It was touch and go whether he’d pull through, and after 5 weeks in ICU and another 3 weeks on the ward, he was discharged, having received the most amazing care from his surgeon and all other staff. However, it was so hurtful to see the way he had been treated on admission.
From May 2019 onwards he was actively engaging with services and working towards giving up alcohol. However, whilst still waiting for his planned detox, he became unwell. He was so weak and depleted that he had to crawl back to his bed from the bathroom one morning. I called the paramedics, and they were amazing and so kind. One of them had to call the GP about something. The GP said to the paramedic “I can see from his notes that he’s alcoholic, its perhaps time for some tough love. Tell him I can see him here at the surgery at 11.30!” He saw the word alcoholic and was blinkered by this, showing no further interest in his health. At that time, my son was actively attending appointments with his Community Psychiatric Nurse (CPN) and had been waiting for a planned detox for several months. Even the paramedics were taken aback at the GP’s comments. If my son was too weak to walk from the bathroom to his bed, then he certainly would not be going to the GP surgery! In the end, he went to the hospital with the paramedics and was kept in for 7 days.
In June 2020, I called the GP around 5pm, after Graeme had a seizure. He told me just to keep an eye on him. When I pressed him for more help, he said he “supposed” he could write a prescription if I could pick it up. Of course, I agreed that I would. Then he changed his mind again saying “however, I don’t want to give him the prescription if he’s just going to start drinking again tomorrow”. So, in the end, he did nothing except tell me to keep an eye on him. Graeme had another seizure a couple of hours later, then whilst I was on the phone to ambulance services, he then had a third one. What I never understood was, if there was something the GP could have given, then why didn’t he?
My son had always been told he would have to have a hospital detox and should never just abruptly stop drinking. Over a few months he started having vomiting bouts and viruses. He was unable to keep anything down, including water, for a couple of days at a time. This brought on seizures and other withdrawal symptoms. It obviously went against the advice of not stopping abruptly.
Sadly, the GPs had no advice other than keep an eye on him. Tragically, this advice was not enough as my son passed away in 2020 after a seizure brought on a cardiac arrest, whilst I was “keeping an eye on him”.
I do think that if someone has an alcohol addiction, then this is sometimes just assumed to be the reason for the patient’s symptoms and that other reasons or illnesses are not always considered. My son used to say to me “Mum would I be treated in this way if I had a broken leg, or any other illness such as cancer?” We both knew that would not be the case!
I don’t want to cast blame on health professionals. Overall, they all do such amazing work, and my son received such excellent care on various occasions, particularly in intensive care where he spent 5 weeks in 2018, also for the last 6 days of his life. Paramedics have also been amazing. Overall, we experienced non-judgmental kindness, friendliness and professionalism. However, this is what should always be expected from health professionals, is it not? Is it perhaps the case that more specialized training and education is needed? I certainly think it should be provided. The fact is that lives are being lost due to people feeling too embarrassed or ashamed to seek the help they need when they need it. People are seeking help only to be treated unfairly or with judgement or disdain, which then causes them to retreat in to the “comfort zone” of their addiction.
When my son was ready and willing to go to rehab, his CPN said that she would put his name forward. A month later, at our next appointment, she had not done this because she thought he was often a bit “ambivalent”. Then when, on the 28th of August, I contacted her for support a day before his last seizure, when he again was sick and unable to drink alcohol, the response was “well he has an appointment on 8th September.” Sadly, he had passed away before then.
I do think and hope that attitudes and language are slowly beginning to change. However, if some of the medical profession still have these outdated attitudes then what hope is there for the media and public at large? Stigma also affects families and carers. My mental health certainly took a dip over the years of trying to support my son in addressing help. It felt like I was banging my head against a brick wall at times.
Addressing the outdated stigma which has been prevalent in society would not only help the patients to recover but also help their families and carers. I do think that further education and more specialized training is the way forward to effect change.
*In 2023, Irene took part in the See Beyond Scotland campaign, showcasing a series of letters and films written by family members and friends to their loved ones who died from alcohol or drugs.
Read Irene’s letter to Graeme here: Irene | Seebeyondscotland
